A
DAY TO REMEMBER
Month of
October 2012 i.e. the day of 5th and 6th Oct, a wedding day for my first and only daughter
which was a happy time for families to celebrate this occasion. There were
two main events in a typical Malay-Muslim wedding; the Solemnisation
or Akad Nikah (which is the
Islamic requirement) held at our house in Seksyen 19 Shah Alam and the Majlis
Bersanding (the Malay
traditional wedding reception ) held at
De Palma Hotel Shah ALam
The Akad Nikah ceremony at our house has been a very colourful, this happy state of
affairs starts with a more private and solemn ceremony, guests mainly our
closed family and friends.
During
the akad nikah ceremony, takes place with the Tok Kadi, the Groom,
and Wali
(representation of the Bride seeking marriage, a guardian or usually the
Bride’s father), and two male witnesses.
The
normal norm where Tok Kadi
hold the right hand of the Groom with his right hand for the akad nikah
ceremony but I took this opportunity to gain some experience, as a bride father
to solemnise the groom, feel relatively shaky and nervous with all eyes staring
at me. Still remember asking the groom:
"Nur Hussein bin Haji Abd Aziz (name of
groom), I hereby marry you to Rose Diyana binti Abd Razak with the Mahr of a
ring (or any other item/monetary value)."
As
expected I made a mistake instead of mentioning my daughter name Rose Diyana
binti Mohd Rosdy, I addressed it as Rose Diyana binti “Abd Razak”. Embarassment of course with some people
laughing…. The solemnisation is often a high-stress moment for father
and even the groom, as friends and
relatives will take this opportunity to tease the nervous groom as well a father too.
Again I then shake the groom's hand
and this time all the words mentioned perfectly correct
The groom then repled immediately:
"I accept (or agree) to marry Rose Diyana
binti MOnd Rosdy with the Mahr of a ring".
The groom uttered those words clearly
in one breath and e clearly heard by the main witnesses sitting beside the
Imam. The Imam then asked both witnesses
and others whether the groom's vows or recital can be accepted. The Imam or
witnesses were satisfied with the vows made by the groom and therefore declared
husband and wife.
Completely relieved after the ceremony, however the feeling of sadness
especially my wife, as now her daughter will begin her new life, build her own
family, its no longer our responsibility on her. She was quite emotional having
seeing her daughter after the solemnisation, kissing her daughter with tears.
Finally, with 3 month preparation
, the next which is the big day THE PERSANDINGAN ("WEDDING
CEREMONY") held at De Palma Hotel which will be a wonderful and colourful event when two
souls are bound together.
The bonquet hall of De Palma Hotel with a limited capacity of 800
pax caused some anxiety for us, not all friends will be
invited with such limited capacity, to avoid bad feelings of neighbors and
friends who may have been inadvertently left out during the dispatch of the
wedding cards.
The big day, a formal wedding ceremony be filled with relatives,
neighbours, friends children from far and wide congregating at the hotel. The bersanding ceremony begins with the
groom's procession with friends, relatives, musicians and people waving bunga manggar (palm blossom) to meet
the bride. The couple are considered royalty for the day, and so various royal
customs are performed for them, including musicians playing court music and
'bodyguards' performing a display of silat (traditional Malay martial arts). It was a very colourful event where guests
dressed with malay traditional dress ( “ baju Melayu”) or batik shirt.
The Big Day was successful and this be our greastest memory for my family. Diyan !!!! Take care yourself we pray for your happy family.
